Connections.....

Larry's Thoughts:::

Work has been rather chaotic for Bridge and myself. For those that don't know, we are both community college advisors- myself at Northeast Lakeview and her at Palo Alto. I was walking down the hall at work last Friday and, with all the students waiting for advising or assistance, sometimes it gets so loud that you can't hear yourself think. But I did overhear the conversation between two young ladies talking about their respective boyfriends. One was talking about how lazy hers was and how seemingly unhappy she was, which I commonly hear young people talk about. However, the other young lady was talking about how happy she was and how theirs was a unique relationship. The part of the conversation that struck me most was when the happier young lady described how she felt as "love isn't a strong enough word".

Of all the entire conversations in that loud hallway, I was surprised that what I caught was such a powerful statement as that. I reflected on that statement for the rest of the day and over the weekend about the connections we have in life and those individuals that share our lives. Whether it be a friend, family member, child, husband, wife, or whomever, we all form connections with these people. Some are stronger than others however and formulate the people we become. Shakespeare himself said, "tis better to love and lost than to never have loved at all". However I think that it does not necessarily just refer to romantic love but the love that forms these deep connections. If we close ourselves off to love and connecting to others, we truly deprive ourselves of that which forms who we are. A child learns empathy from someone who empathized to him or her at a young age. A husband treats his wife with love and respect that in turn is given back to him by her love and respect. We become the humans that are capable of awesome and worthwhile ventures and successes by experiencing all the up's and down's that these deep connections give us.

My earliest connections were with my grandfathers who emulated to me, as a young boy, what it was like to treat others with respect, to be patient with those whom are different than myself, to be kind, and to use my intelligence in school among other things. These connections with them began to form me at a young age that I'm glad I have retained as I've grown into an adult. Sadly I lost my paternal grandfather when I was still relatively young but I did appreciate all the childhood and teenage memories I had that are still cherished by me. I was blessed to have my maternal grandfather up until last year when he left to a better place. Since I did have him for such a long time, I was able to experience what it was like to mature and grow into a man with him by my side. Losing him was more painful than words can describe but I try to remind myself that, as selfish as it is to want to keep them here, I cannot do so.

It is rather unique that sometimes these connections we form in life can defy time because we often see people mourning years and sometimes decades after someone passes on or simply leaves your life. We cling to the memories of those spouses, friends, family, etc that are no longer with us that we stay connected to without regard to how much time has passed. How painful yet how wonderful it is to be so connected to someone that the very scent of a perfume, a song played from years ago, or a visit to a special location unleashes a flood of memories that are as vivid as they day they originally happened. I think everyone should take the time to reflect on those who we are truly connected to and what connects them together. Nothing and no one should be taken for granted because the future is a book still being written. I feel blessed that Bridge and myself are connected so deeply. The funny thing is that it happened without us ever trying to make it happen but I suppose that is the truest sign of two people meant to be together. I tell her that I had to hit rock-bottom in life to fully appreciate her and the connection we have (as well as the connections I had to people like my grandfathers). I love her very much and am excited about the life we have together ahead of us because she is truly a wonderful human being and our life is one that I always wanted.

"Blessed is the person who appreciates without having had the pain but wise is the person who appreciates having had the pain."

Have a good day and a good week and remember to cherish the connections in your life!